College Success: Midterms are coming. Everyone who's freaking out, raise your hands.

This is a point in the semester when the number of students seeking my help increases dramatically.  Sadly, I hear all too often,  "I'm so freaked out!"  "I don't know if I'm gonna pass my midterms." "I am so overwhelmed I don't know where to start."

The primary reason people find themselves feeling like this is because they haven't made college a priority and therefore haven't done the amount of work that's required.  Period.  I can't tell you how many students admit that, in the sixth or seventh week of the semester, they haven't yet opened their textbooks.  Seriously. And they wonder why they're freaked out.

But I'm not here to scold or shame anyone.  I'd like to help.  Here are some tips to help you make a plan to study for midterms:


1.  Schedule time to study.
Yes, I said schedule.  Block out chunks of time on your calendar for each course and stick to the plan.

2.  Find a quiet place to study where you will not be interrupted.
Your room (but not on your bed), dining room (if you live alone), the campus Library, the public library, the campus Learning Center.  Be sure to sit at a desk or table with good light, and a sturdy chair to support your back.  Your bed or sofa is too comfy, and you might be tempted to grab a quick nap when you had planned to study.

3.  Gather your materials
Pull together your textbooks, notebooks, and any other relevant materials for each course, including Power Point slides, homework, quizzes, writing assignments.  Have all of the school supplies you'll need for each subject, and a clock to manage your time (one with a timer is even better).

4.  Divide and conquer
Put the materials for each course in separate piles.  Tackle the subject you've scheduled first, and set the timer to one hour.  Study one chapter only during this time.  Breaking it down to smaller tasks will make you feel less overwhelmed, and you'll be more motivated to continue.

5.  Plan how to study
Start with your textbook, and review the questions at the end of each chapter.  If you can correctly answer most of them, you're on the right track; if not, take the time to read the chapter again.  Use your class notes as well, because a lot of information professors offer during a lecture often doesn't come from the book. Since they made the effort to give more material to help you understand, it will likely be on a test. 

A tip I use when studying is to copy my notes over in another notebook.  This gives me the freedom to scribble down what I can in class.  Not only do I end up with neatly organized notes, I remember what I'm writing and it helps me to better understand the topic.  Index cards as a study tool works well, too.

If you need help with taking notes or studying for exams, please visit the nice people in the Learning Center in Elston 523.

6.  Attend review sessions, study groups, professor's office hours

If your professor offers review sessions, GO.  Bring questions you have, and be prepared to add to your notes.  You may also consider getting a study buddy, or start a study group for each class. Sometimes another student can explain things in terms that another student can understand.

7.  Set reasonable goals
Don't plan to study more than an hour at a time; your brain can handle only so much at once.  Which leads me to... 

8.  Give yourself a break!
Plan a break to give your mind and body a rest after each hour of studying. The best breaks include some type of physical exercise: 10-minute fast walk outside, stretching exercises for the muscles that tighten as we concentrate so hard are great, a phone call with your BFF, healthy food break, and whatever else may work for you.  Break for no more than 15-20 minutes, so you can get back to studying feeling refreshed and motivated; more than that will set you up to extend the break to 30 minutes...an hour...two...  You get my point.

9.  Tips for the night before an exam

Stop studying at least an hour before you go to bed.  You've done a lot of work to prepare, so be confident in what you know.  Do something unrelated to studying, like watching a favorite TV show, a hot shower, catch up on Facebook, and so on.  Wind down to prepare yourself to get a good night's rest (as corny as that sounds)...at least 8 hours.  Research has proven that students perform better when they are alert and calm.

10.  Exam Day
Eat breakfast, get to campus early and take time to relax.  Breathing deeply for a few minutes can help calm your jitters and get you focused.  Do not study more; cramming will do nothing but get you whipped up into a tizzy and you'll undo all of the great studying you've done.  Let your mind rest so you're ready to go in there and nail it.



Source:  http://www.nkaleidoscope.com/confetti/2012/01/13/how-to-prepare-for-midterm-exams/
(All images courtesy of Google Images, unless otherwise indicated.)

(c) Copyright 2012-2014 Robyn M.Posson King.  All Rights Reserved.

Relationships: Feb. 14th...Do something nice for yourself instead.

 Image Source

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I heard on the news last night that in the United States alone, people spend over $1 billion (yes, I said BILLION) on Valentine's Day.  All I can say is...Really.  Are you freakin' kidding me?

In my work, I hear all too often from unattached folks about the heartbreak of not "being with someone," and the reminder that they are alone...again...on a major holiday like Valentine's Day.  

Those who are in a relationship worry and are annoyed by the expectations of "having to do something" for their partners...but not knowing what to do, how much to do, and how they're going to pay for it.  

It saddens me that a day dedicated to show our love and appreciation with loved ones is so ridden with angst, disappointment and profound sadness.

Let's change that way of thinking today.  Right now.

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Regardless of your "connection-status," I propose that each of us take a moment every day and show our love and appreciation first for ourselves.  

Think about how far you've come, how grateful you are for the opportunities brought your way, your health, and list all of the things that are wonderful about you.

I know, I know...you think this is loon crazy.  But hear me out.  Only when we truly love ourselves as we are today, will we ever be able to feel true love for someone else.  It's impossible to be loved by someone worthy if we don't first feel deserving and worthy ourselves.

If you're single, do something nice for yourself today.  Take yourself out to eat, go to a movie with friends, or buy a small box of your favorite candy (that you don't have to share with anyone!).  

And contrary to the ridiculous statistic I mentioned above, those of you who are in a relationship need not spend a lot of money to show your partner how you feel.  A card, one flower, a heartfelt spoken expression of your appreciation, gratitude and love will do the job.  For realz.

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Anyhoo...I have written a series of blog entries that I hope you'll find informative, interesting and helpful.  I call it the "ABC's of Healthy Relationships," and its purpose is to remind people how to love themselves first, and how to treat their partners (or potential partners) in ways that will up the chances of having the best relationships ever.

PS:  Happy Valentine's Day to Me...and You.   


(c) 2012-2017 Robyn  King.  All Rights Reserved.

College Success: Tips for a Successful Semester



Image:  redhotpepperspray.com

You know the drill...on the first day of every semester, you're happy to be on campus, your hopes and confidence for academic success are high, and you're absolutely certain that any old behaviors, personal drama, job demands and/or family responsibilities that previously held you back (in high school or in a previous semester) will no longer be an issue.  THIS semester will be different.  You're sure of that.

Image:  eduinreview.com

 

Then...around week five of the semester, things start to shift.  You're feeling the full impact of what being a college student entails.  Papers and classroom presentations are coming due.  Midterm exams are right around the corner.  You have a group project to contribute to.  Your boss/significant other/friends/family/etc. are getting on your nerves, you're feeling overwhelmed by all you need to do...and you haven't even opened your textbook yet.  The behaviors you swore were behind you begin creeping back in.  How did you get into this crazy predicament...again???

Here are some suggestions and tips to improve your skills and have a more successful semester:


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Managing your time is crucial.  It's virtually impossible to get everything done on time if you are not organized.  If you don't own a planner, get one (or download an app on your mobile device...just be sure it's something you will look at several times a day).  When you get the syllabus (course outline) for each class, put all of the important information on your planner--including reading assignments, quizzes, midterm and final exam dates, research paper and/or class presentation due dates.  Then block out your work schedule, family obligations, outside appointments, etc. every week. Finally, schedule two hours of study time each week for every credit for which you're registered (ex:  taking 15 credits X 2 hours study time = 30 hours study time every week).   If you need assistance with this process, meet with a professional staff member in the Learning Center in Elston 523.



Image:  thegeminigeek.com

Procrastination is a college student's worst enemy.  If you have procrastinated (and still have done well) in the past, don't be fooled by the belief that you only get good grades when you get things done last minute.  This will not work in college.  You have a busy life, class requirements seem to become due around the same time, and leaving work to the last minute will make you feel crazy and overwhelmed.  The worst part is that you will not have learned the topic as well as you could have, causing you trouble next semester, such as if the course you're taking is a prerequisite for another course.  Get organized and stay current with your work.

Image:  mbeckerlaw.com



Your course syllabus is a contract between you and your professor.  It clearly defines the professor's responsibilities, the rules and regulations for how the class is structured and the behaviors expected, and what is expected of you as a student and how your grade will be determined.  If after reading and going over the syllabus, you're not willing or are unable to do everything required, then drop the class.  However, if you choose to stay in the class, it is understood that you agree to and are bound by the conditions of the course syllabus. 

Image:  saintraymond.net

Successful students ask for help when they need it.  Professors list their office hours on the syllabus, and this is when you can get extra help (before and after your class may not be convenient, as the professor may need to get to another class).  Also, SCCC offers many other services to help students succeed (Counseling, Tutoring, Learning Center, Math Lab, Accounting Lab, TRIO, Computer Lab,
Employment Services) and they are all FREE to registered students. 

Image:  Google Images

The way in which you read a textbook or took notes in high school will no longer work in college.  If you're struggling with how to effectively tackle your reading assignments, and take better, more organized notes, meet with a professional staff member in the Learning Center.

Go to class every day, get there on time, and show up prepared.  Do your reading assignments before class, write down questions you want to ask the professor.  Bring a notebook and something to write with every time.  Focus on the class only (no texting, talking, or other shenanigans), and take notes during the lecture.  Show the same respect for your professors and class mates that you require them to give you.

Image: metamorphicinternational.org

Set your priorities and get comfortable with saying "no."  College must be your first priority.  If you need to do homework, start a paper, or read for tomorrow morning's lecture, then you need to turn down other activities.  Say no.  If it is your priority to finish college with the best grades you can earn in the shortest amount of time possible, you have to focus on that priority and say no to anything that gets in the way of that.

Image:  lsua.edu

Develop a good relationship with your faculty advisor.  Your advisor is perhaps the most important person in your college experience.  He/she will advise and guide you toward graduation, but because you are an adult and are in control, you make the final decisions about what to do.  Your advisor can also refer you to campus support services, tell you about internships in your field, and even write a recommendation letter for getting into another college or for a job.  

The secret to this is getting to know your advisor, and having them get to know you.  Drop in during office hours (posted on their door) and let them know how you're doing, what your career goals are, and so on.  Your advisor can be an awesome ally to have...but you have to take the first step to make it happen.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Well, these tips are enough to get you started.  Talk with your professors, advisor, a counselor, coach or mentor to help get you on (and keep you on) the right track toward academic success...this semester and beyond.  Good luck!

QUESTION:  What tips do you have for academic success?

(c) 2011-2016 Robyn King.  All Rights Reserved.



Getting to Know You: Shame on you, shame.

Brene' Brown

Dr. Brene' Brown is an internationally known researcher and speaker on the topic of shame.  She knows shame inside-out.

She defines it as "The intensely painful feeling that we are unworthy of love and belonging." Ouch.  Talk about hitting home.

This link is an excerpt from her appearance on "Super Soul Sunday" where she shares what she knows about this horrible, lethal feeling.

When you're finished watching, please share your reactions.


(c)2014-16 Robyn King.  All Rights Reserved.

Wellness Wisdom: Why you need to quit smoking TODAY (video)

The Truth About Tobacco

Please click on the link above for lifesaving information.



(c) 2011-2016 Robyn King.  All Rights Reserved.

College Success: Read ahead.

In college, the best way to get ahead and stay ahead is to READ ahead.

There will come a time during the semester where you'll have something due from each class at the same time.  To help you avoid the unnecessary stress and pulling all-nighters, get in the habit of reading your chapters at least one week ahead.  Another bonus to this approach is that the lectures you'll sit through will make a whole lot more sense, and you won't feel the need to write down everything your professor says.

So put your nose in your books every day. You will thank me for this later.  Promise.


(c)2011-16 Robyn King. All Rights Reserved.

Wellness Wisdom: We're going tobacco-free on Sept. 1.

Beginning September 1, 2013, our campus will transition to being tobacco free.  SUNY Chancellor Nancy Zimpher has sent this mandate to all 64 SUNY campuses to require compliance.

As you can well imagine, this presents many challenges to our students, faculty, staff and visitors who smoke, and to the campus community who must find a way to abide by the rules.

SCCC will make many efforts to support smokers in their quest to quit smoking, through educational programming, printed information and counseling to support the "white-knuckling" that goes hand-in-hand with recovering from an addiction.

We want to help.  Come to Elston 222 and reach out.

(c)2013 Robyn M. Posson.  All Rights Reserved.

College Success: Ten Things You Need to Do Before The First Day at College

1.  Be sure your tuition has been paid
Even if you're receiving Financial Aid (grants, scholarships and/or loans), check on the status of your bill with the Student Business Office (381-1346).  SCCC also has a payment plan available.  Classes will be dropped for those students whose tuition bills are not paid by the deadline.

2.  Submit proof of immunization

Stop into Elston 222 and speak with Betsy (381-1344) to turn in your immunization records and/or to see whether you've been cleared to attend classes.  Classes will be dropped for those students whose immunization records are not submitted by the first day of the semester.

3.  Student ID and parking permit
You can obtain them now until the end of the second week of classes.  Print a copy of your class schedule, grab your car's registration, and bring them with you to the Activity Forum in Elston Hall.  Get in the habit of carrying the ID with you at all times.

4.  Textbooks
Sold in the College Store (Elston Hall, first floor), you can buy new or used, or rent textbooks.  You'll need your student ID, class schedule, and a way to pay for them (cash, check, credit cards are accepted; some students may be eligible for bookstore credit through the Financial Aid office).

5.  Transportation

• If you have a car, be sure it is in good working order, hang your parking permit on the rear-view mirror, and park in student parking areas only.
• If taking public transportation, be sure that you know when the bus runs and when it will arrive at campus (They can drop you at the front door!).  You can use your student ID card to swipe and ride anywhere, any time while classes are in session, for FREE.
• If you're relying on another person to give you a ride, arrange a back-up plan so if you're driver is ill or the car breaks down you can still get to campus.
  

5.  Study space
Establish a quiet place with no distractions somewhere in your home where you feel comfortable.  Set up a table or desk where you can easily spread out your books, use a computer/laptop, and do your work.  If you need to study on-campus, there are a couple of quiet zones:  Begley Library, second floor and the Learning Center, Elston 528.

6.  Use a weekly planner and monthly calendar
To stay organized and on top of your college work and personal life, a planner and calendar will come in very handy.  If you've never used this method to be organized, stop in at the Learning Center, and they will gladly show you how to set up the process.  Take my word for it:  busy college students NEED to have a solid plan to be organized. 

7.  Work schedule
There's a formula we use to explain to college students how to be academically successful:  for every credit hour you're taking, you will have at least 2 hours of outside work (reading textbook, studying, researching for a paper, etc).  For example, if you're registered for 15 credits, that equates to:

15 hours per week in the classroom + 30 hours of classwork outside the classroom =

45 hours of college work

That's a full-time job all by itself.  Talk with your employer to arrange a schedule that will accommodate the number of hours you'll need to devote to college responsibilities.  It is strongly recommended, also, that if you are registered as a full-time student you should not work a job for more than 20 hours per week.  If you can't live on that and need to work full-time, seriously consider studying on a part-time basis.  One of the main reasons students drop out or fail is that they try to work and study full-time...and there just aren't enough hours in the week to do that.

8.  Schedule study time

As crazy as that sounds, you need to treat study hours like going to class or to your job:  the days and times must be scheduled in your planner and on the calendar.  Study time is not negotiable.  You wouldn't blow off going to work if you had the opportunity to hang out with friends or going shopping, for example.  You'd be fired in a heartbeat.  The same goes with studying.  The time you carve out in your schedule is only for studying.  While you're at it, learn to say no to family and friends who unintentionally try to pull you away from hitting the books.

9.  Child care

If you have little ones who need looking after while you're on campus, be sure you have reliable and flexible child care.  SCCC has a policy that children are not allowed in educational spaces (classrooms, labs, Library, etc.) nor are they to be left unattended anywhere on campus.  To prevent missing classes, have at least one child-care back-up (although two back-ups is better).  Another primary reason students fail or drop-out is that their child-care arrangements didn't work out or fell through.

10.  Make coming to college your No. 1 priority.
When you decide to put your education as  your most important priority, you will undoubtedly be successful.  Why?  Because you'll learn to say no to things that might be fun to do at the moment, but will ultimately take your focus off of achieving your educational and career goals in the long-run.  Because you'll MAKE time to study, stay on top of your reading assignments, turn in ALL of your work on time.  Because you will be proud of yourself when you finish what you are starting here because you put the work into it, and will recognize that if you are not successful, it will be because you didn't.

All of us at SCCC have complete faith in your abilities, and want you to succeed.  If you need help, ask.  If you can help a fellow student who you know is struggling, reach out.  If you know you can make our campus and surrounding community better places to be, get involved.  If you see someone with an armful of books and is having difficulty opening a door, do the right thing and hold it open (or offer to carry some of them!).

You can do it.

(c)2013 Robyn M. Posson  All rights reserved.

Relationships: Put Down Your Dukes: 10 Rules for Having a Fair Argument

Okay, okay...break it up.

Unlike a boxing match, the goal of any disagreement should be to resolve the conflict rather than to win or "come out on top." Resolution comes more quickly and easily when each person feels like they've been heard, understood, and a mutually respectful solution is agreed upon by both parties and then implemented.

Da rulz.

So take off the gloves and follow these ten tips to improve the way you resolve differences with your partner or other person (referred to here on as OP).

1. Express your resentments and concerns as soon as you are aware of them.  Do not attack the OP's character.
2. Argue only one point at a time.
3. No name calling, finger-pointing, raised voices or acting out in a threatening or violent way.

   

   Hold hands

4. If arguing with your partner, hold hands and look at each other.  With OP, face and look at him/her.  (It will convey that you're paying attention.)
5. Let the other person speak without interruption. 
6. Never ridicule or make light of the other person's feelings. Instead, respond as much as possible with "I feel..." or "I want..." statements of your own. 
7. Reflect back what the other person says to you:  "If I heard you right, you said that you're angry because..."  If you misunderstood, ask for clarification, and reflect again until you get it right.

   

   Couldn't explain it better.
8. Validate that person's feelings:  "I can understand why you are angry about that."
9. Offer a mutually agreed-upon solution:  "Could we try to do ______ differently by ______?" Discuss options and find one that works for both of you.  Promise to follow-through.  Then do it.
10. Admit when you are wrong and offer a sincere apology (operative word being sincere):  "I'm sorry that this happened.  I'll do better in the future, etc." 
11. BONUS:  Kiss and make up (unless it's your boss or OP, then shaking hands will do).

    

    Love birds.

(c)2013-16 Robyn King.  All Rights Reserved.

Wellness wisdom: Put the oxygen mask on yourself first.

Image: Google

If you've ever flown on a commercial airplane, you've no doubt sat through the emergency shpiel given before take-off.  My favorite part is the oxygen mask:  In the event of an emergency, I am to put the mask on myself first so that I may help others around me.

This instruction is also true of daily living.  Some of us are givers, and give-give-give until we have nothing left for ourselves and wonder why we're always tired, out-of-steam, anxious and not very happy.

The oxygen mask represents making self-care the primary priority.  It's literally our life-line that must be attended to daily.  Are you eating at least three times a day with healthy snacks between?  Drinking 8 cups of water?  Getting regular exercise?  Waking up refreshed after a good night's sleep?  Having FUN?  

If we're not at our best, how can we expect to be of any use to others?

Do not, however, confuse this with being selfish (which I think is a horrible word, but that's another blog post).  Taking care of ourselves is mandatory, because...when you think about it...you're all you've got.

Put the oxygen mask on yourself first, then proceed to assist others.  (Complimentary peanuts and soft drinks will be distributed momentarily.)

(c)2013 Robyn M. King.  All Rights Reserved.