HELP! I need to get out of a toxic relationship. How can I end it but let her down easy?

Your compassion shows how much you care about others' feelings, but the truth is that it won't be easy.  That said, toxic relationships are a danger to our health, well-being, self-esteem and a huge waste of our precious time.  You need to make a clean break.

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When you decide when and where to speak with her (in person), be sure to use “I” statements when telling her that it’s over (“I’m not interested in seeing you any longer,” “I’ve realized that my priorities have changed…” etc.). When you start each statement with “I,” it will keep her from getting defensive, and even though she will be upset, she will hear you say that you have identified your role in the relationship and aren’t necessarily pointing a finger at her. Also, it’s very possible that she’s feeling the same way about your partnership but has been unable to end it herself.

Don’t wait. Don't allow her to guilt you into delaying the inevitable.  End it.  Today.  Your health depends on it.


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