From the Counselor's Desk: Relationships: The Breakup Recovery Plan (Step 6)

[Note: Although this entry was written for a woman in a heterosexual relationship, these same principles will help anyone whose relationship has ended.]

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Whether you were together for two weeks, six months, or four years, breakups hurt. A LOT. What’s worse, they can be really hard to get past. A breakover is a set plan that moves you from the initial pain of a breakup to re-creating your life into what you want, better than what you had, with your confidence lifted and personal integrity intact. With the help of Greg Behrendt and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt (authors of It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken), here is The Breakover Plan:

1. No contact for 60 days.

2. Get yourself a Breakup Buddy.
3. Gather your Dream Team.

4. Allow yourself to grieve.

5. Get rid of his stuff.

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6. In with the new: Reclaim your living space. It's time to reinvent the place where you live. Clear it out of old, painful reminders of a life you will no longer have. Instead, create a new perspective, and make room for great new things to come. Make your space feel fresh and renewed. Rearrange the furniture. Hang up some new posters. Buy a new set of sheets or candles in your favorite scent. Paint one wall with your favorite color. Having your home look different will move you toward thinking and feeling hopeful about the new chapter ahead of you.

Next step: 7. Meet with a counselor